May 11th
I’ve turned into a monster. I find myself scouring the yard constantly for tasty creatures to feed my growing girls. More often than not I find them in my house! I’m going to stop protesting that my house is clean because obviously it’s a cesspool, teeming with vermin. I can’t go a day without finding a beetle or some other kind of bug, grabbing it between two fingers and sticking the poor bastard between the bars of the “death cage”.
No matter how hard I try, I can never give the morsel to anyone but Violet. She is the smartest, greediest bird in creation. Often, however, one of her sisters is able to wrest the victim from her beak, but they never get first chomp. Jim has never been a fan of crawling, slithering or buzzing things, but even he is getting in on the act. This morning he emerged from the bathroom covered in shaving cream (face, not legs) and nonchalantly handed me a bug. I took it without comment and dropped it in the cage. On my morning walk I pick up near-dead but still-buzzing cicadas (Alabama is in the midst of the 13-year locust invasion, look it up) so my chicks have been feasting on the loud bugs for a week now. They prefer living morsels but will tear apart a dead one in a pinch. I stop short on catching roly-polys because I’ve always had a soft spot for the little guys. Same goes for lady bugs, but who knows where this madness will end? I never thought I’d be peeling flies of my swatter for my chickens and then calmly washing my hands. When I do this, my husband looks at me in disgust, shakes his head and mutters one word…chickens. Jim’s a keeper.
I showed my little maniac the wonders of the roly poly just this morning. There are always tons of them wandering around the parking lot at the library, and she always freaks out… until I showed her they can roll into a ball. Now they are the coolest thing in her world since snails. And snails are pretty darn cool.
Yes, roly polys have always made me smile. Snails, not so much. They are pretty good with garlic and butter!
She is obsessed with the snails. Every time she sees one, it’s like its the first time. (And we have a gazillion of them) Oh, and they are all named “Gary.” She watches just a little too much Spongebob.
Oh, and Ewwww on the eating them.
C’mon Erica. Give props to your I-talian relatives! Snails rule! And I thought all snails were named Gary too. Meeeeowwww
I’ma hopin’ this here’ll get me prescribed to this here crazy chicken lady……
Well, hell. I’ma tryin’ agin.
You dun it cuz! I bet Old Walter Anderson woulda loved chickens!
Love your stories!! They make me smile!
Just signed up, looking forward to more smiling moments!
Cindy, come visit the ladies soon before they get to be “fryer” weight!
Thank you! I’ll try to keep you entertained.
PLEASE don’t resort to feeding them roly polys! I would have to quit reading these hilarious updates ~ it would be too painful!
Jill, have no fear. The roly polys are safe. There are plenty of other bugs in my house to keep the chicks satisfied!
LMAO!!! out loud might I add
Poor Jim. Pray he doesn’t leave me. I’ll never find anyone else who would live with me.